Show me the love

    So this week has definitely brought some revelations . . .As I have said, I have three little treasures.  They are all uniquely different and wonderful.  However, Treasure #2, this week has taught me a lot about how to love uniquely.  He is my most sensitive and declares himself a mama's boy.  My husband threw his back out last week and my respect for single moms again went through the roof . . .I felt like I was managing a team, rather than being able to give specific attention and lots of encouragement.  My patience finally shipwrecked Sunday morning.  When you are married to a preacher who often has meetings before church, Sunday mornings with three kids is anything but easy . . .I never understood the thought behind the Commodores song, sigh.  Anyways, my son has the passion of his father, and let's just say their emotions far outweigh the emotions of all three of us estrogen producing ones.  It's easy for me to constantly find myself repeating, "Caleb, no" or "don't do that Caleb" or "Please stop bothering your sisters!"  He's the middle child between, a smart, always aiming to please and easy older sister and a center stage, life of the party younger one.  Now, in the middle of this birth order is the most affectionate, sensitive, "best smile in the world", makes me always feel loved, bright eyed seven year old boy, that has my heart like no other.  I've just had to learn lately to make sure he has declarative, bold affirmation that leaves no doubt in his little mind that there is any competition or question of how I feel about him.  When I do this, he shines brightly and everything good in him is exponentially visible to me and others around him.  Every night, I kiss him and hug him at least 12 times and tell him how he's my favorite son.  He always rebuts that it's only because he's my only son and then I proceed to tell him why I love him, and his face beams.   I always know and believe why I think he's so amazing, but in the daily, patience-trying moments of life, I can forget to make sure he knows that I think that.  After one of these recent nights, Emma said something not entirely encouraging to him and he was deflated.  She and I talked a few minutes later and I explained some of these things to her.  Her heart was melted and it resulted in the above note that she wrote to her brother and then was followed by a huge hug (that rather shocked him).  Her assurance and confirmation of how she really feels about him made his day (and night).
       When I think about myself, I am always in need of assurance.  Left by myself for too long, I can tell you a thousand imperfections about me and why I don't measure up.  Words of affirmation and being shown love by others puts the wind in my sails. I've had to learn to accept, that ultimately God has shown me his love in the most amazing of ways and as much as I'd like to explain away why he shouldn't, his "letters of affirmation" prove otherwise.  I can feel guilty and bad about myself enough and yet when I stop to really hear and allow myself to be shown how God feels about me, it gives me the confidence and security to actually believe it, and therefore, to revel in it.

Deut. 7:6  "The Lord your God has chosen you out of all the peoples on the face of the earth to be his people, his treasured possession."

Eph. 3:17-19  "And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, ¹⁸ may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, ¹⁹ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."